IN-Focus

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A senior public servant has made the decision to leave some very important work until Monday, taking his phone off the hook and putting the cricket on. Prime Minister Scott Morrison told The Advocate this afternoon via telephone that we would be his last official duty of the week. Despite it being 2:47pm on a Friday,...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A French Quarter man who lives in a garden apartment has bought himself a leaf blower to tidy the outside area because using a broom is "obviously too hard". Unbeknown to the little man, all of his neighbours go to sleep dreaming about putting him down. One of the unknown man's upstairs neighbours has spoken to...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Perth man has told The Advocate the stolen Hobart Test today because there's no TV inside his traditional yurt. "It's not because I'm still a bit filthy at the east-centric Cricket Australia board taking the Test away from Perth because we take our biosecurity seriously," said Cannington man Klaas Baardwijk. "But yes, ever since the...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Prime Minister has once again made changes to the way in which Australians deal with the spicy cough - this time, transport workers were given new guidelines. In order to ease the strain on the nation's supply chains, Scott Morrison announced that transport workers are no longer deemed to be close contacts unless they...

FR ROGER STEELE | Religious Affairs | Contact Special Counsel assisting the Morrison Government, Brian Houston, has yet to make a decision on tennis world number one Novak Djokovic's visa - something that has forced Prime Minister Scott Morrison and Immigration Minister Alex Hawke to kick the can down the road further today. Mr Houston, who used to moonlight as the...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The defacto leader of the failed state of New South Wales has moved to assure people that despite nearly registering a hundred thousand cases of the hyper-infectious spicy cough in the past 24 hours, everything is fine. Premier Dominic Perrottet explained to journalists this morning in our nation's super expensive version of Mogadishu that this...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A French Quarter property investor is seeking a rental increase from one of his tenants this week as the world returns to something resembling the old world. In late 2019, Walter Butler's unrenovated townhouse on Rue Les Taudis was renting out for close to $700 a week. However, when the pandemic hit in March of 2020, swathes...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact In a sign that things are starting to get worse here in our cosmopolitan desert community, a local sexagenarian has put away the cloth mask his sister-in-law made last year from an old shirt and slipped on an N95 doomsday shield. They retail for close to $10 each in the French Quarter but 67-year-old retiree...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A digital book library for people with ADHD has been put into a local woman's junk drawer until the world stops spinning today as her summer holiday to the coast ends and the office opens back up. French Quarter city worker Rachael Carmichael only received the Kindle for Christmas from her live-in boyfriend, Kelvin, who...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Lockdowns are set to continue in 2022 after Prime Minister Scott Morrison told journalists today in Canberra that they'll become a thing of the past. In recent weeks, whatever the Prime Minister has said in regards to pretty much anything has been met with backflips weeks later. Which is why many in the community are tipping...