Politics

“We’ll Keep This Between Us” Says Grandpa Kev After Finding Scotty’s Zoo Magazine Sock

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT COULD YOU COME IN HERE FOR A SEC: Former Prime Minister Kevin Rudd has once again spared Scotty From Marketing the humiliation of being exposed as as lazy public servant who spends more time playing with his dick than he spends on the phone to multinational pharmaceutical executives. This isn’t the first time the first time the retired Brisbane...

We Interview The One Australian That Reckons Getting A Jab Was An Easy And Transparent Process

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With just less than 3 million Australians that have received both of their shots, it's become quite clear that Australia's current jab roll-out is the most needlessly complicated government program since they sent letters to the entire population to ask them what their vibe was regarding marriage equality. However, it has been reported today that 38-year-old from Betoota's leafy...

“Look At This Bloody Dickahead” Says Nonno

MARKUS VENUTI | Italia  | CONTACT It seems that local Ingham resident Raphael Panucci might change his ways after the run Scotty's been having. This comes after almost an entire lifetime of voting for the LNP as a small business owner who hates the bloody banca and taxaman more than his grandkids could ever know. Due to the fact that the only television he has...

“Look Them In The Eyes When They’re Talking To You!” Grandpa Kev Makes Scotty Face The Media

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT TIME TO MAN UP KID: Scotty From Marketing has pulled up just short of apologising for the problems the government has had with the jab roll-out - but he has today admitted that he is willing to 'take responsibility' - a Prime Ministerial duty that he has shown no interest in until now. "I take responsibility for the problems...

“What The Fuck Is That?” Asks Grandpa Kev As Scotty Returns Home With Fluffy White Pomeranian

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australia's former Prime Minister Kevin Rudd has today come to terms with the fact that he won't be leaving his reluctant posting at Kirribilli House for quite some time, after Scotty From Marketing was again proves to the world that he has a long way to go before he is in any shape to be leading the country. This...

“Not Again!!!” Roars Grandpa Kev After Finding One-Way Ticket To Hawaii In Scotty’s Tackle Box

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Grandpa Kev has today realised his role as Australia's fill-in father figure might continue indefinitely after our discovering our flakey Prime Minister's plans to once again skip town in the middle of a crisis. While rummaging through the underwhelming 'man cave' at Kirribilli House, Former PM Kevin Rudd has stumbled across some damning documents that point to Scotty From...

“Do Ya Have Any Real Beer? What’s This Craft Shift?” Scowls Grandpa Kev While Watching Broncos

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australia's former Prime Minister, Grandpa Kev has had to once again intervene today, after being handed some sort of suss yuppy beer when trying to unwind while watching his beloved Broncos get pumped once again by another bottom eight Sydney club. If the 24-42 loss to the Tigers wasn't bad enough, Grandpa Kev's afternoon was most definitely spoiled by...

“How Dare They Call It The Sydney Strain!” Says Sydney Government Responsible For Sydney Strain

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The people who run the government in Sydney are upset that people from other states are calling the recent outbreak of the spicy cough the 'Sydney Strain' because it makes them feel bad. That's the message from the Sydney Premier Gladys Berejiklian this morning as her Brisbane counterpart, Annastacia Palaszczuk, labelled the current outbreak in...

PM: “Sydney Needs Lockdown Cash Boost Because We Need Western Sydney To Win The Election”

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Prime Minister has laughed off suggestions from Victoria that his government has shown preferential treatment to the Liberal New South Wales Government after it was revealed yesterday that the Harbour City is getting some lockdown money while Melbourne got fuck all. "How about those Wallabies last night? Pretty good, hey. But this working-class boy...

Do you wanna design the cover of The Betoota Advocate’s next book? Our publisher will pay you

Do you think you have it in you to design the cover for the upcoming Betoota Advocate book? Are you a budding graphic designer? Can you respond to briefs in a relatively professional manner? Will you not get heartbroken if we decide your work is a little bit too how ya goin? Then maybe you might want to throw your...

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