Outback QLD Pub Proudly Shows Off Framed “7-In-A-Row” Origin Poster They Ordered Prematurely
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
The publican of the Havastink Hotel in Barcaldine's light industrial wetlands says there's a lot of memorabilia on the walls that probably needs to be taken down.
Jock Evette (66) says he could probably afford to lose the arguably racist Rodney Rude posters... as well as the photo from when that coward Peter Garrett came in and had a...
Promising Young Liberal Thankful For Typical Aussie Upbringing Between Ascot And Singapore
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
A twenty-something that could easily be shortlisted to the top ranks of the Coalition in the next fifteen years says he only joined the Young Liberal party because he wanted to see Australia remain as fair and prosperous as he remembers it as a boy.
Hugo Griffin-Knightley (24) says his typical Australian upbringing – which saw him attending several...
Gold Coast Residents Just Want It To Be Clear They Never Thought This Was A Good Idea
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
With councils and state governments pouring cash into shortlived sporting infrastructure ahead of the three month count down to the XXVI Commonwealth games on the Gold Coast, residents say they are not looking forward to their city's traffic congestion problems being on display for the world.
This comes as the Games organisers are already encouraging people to "take advantage...
Kim Jong-un Defeats Federer 6-0 6-0 6-0 To Claim 10th Consecutive Australian Open Title
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
North Korean media has today reported an incredible upset in the Australian Open men's final last night.
Kim Jong-un, the leader of North Korea took the match out against tennis great Roger Federer in a convincing fashion to claim his 10th consecutive Australian open title in as many years.
It was the shortest final in Australian Open history as the...
Surfer Ostracised By Peers For Having Permanent Living Arrangement, Goals
One local surfer, Felix Ettelson (26), has today made the grave mistake of driving his mother’s Lexus from his 4-bedroom house to Betoota’s state of the art, man-made wave dam.
A seemingly innocuous act to the non-surfing community, however, to those in the know, it is a double faux pas that’s considered nearly as bad as being a body-boarder.
Not only...
Report: High School Bully Turned Into Such A Fuck Up Lol
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
A bloke that everyone just assumed would glide into a professional sporting career, or some other role that demanded respect from nerds, has actually proven that high school social status is so very very irrelevant in the greater scheme of thing.
At 28, the once legendary bully named Michael Harby who had the hottest girlfriend who he used to...
Bloke Who Only Listens To Pantera Boycotting Hottest 100 Again After Date Change
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
There’s no denying the date of Australia Day is a controversial subject for all that call the island nation home. In a bold yet completely predictable move that has angered many, radio station triple j decided to move their iconic Hottest 100 countdown from Australia Day.
One man staunch in his beliefs the date should remain is refrigeration specialist...
Local Patriot Discovers Triple M’s Ozzest 100 Exactly The Same As Work Day Playlist
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
As Australia Day festivities take place, men with something to prove all around the nation tuned into Triple M eagerly to hear a playlist they so far have found indistinguishable from the normal workday playlist.
After noticing a gap in the market for those whose music needs were not being met on the anniversary of a cultural decimation, Triple...
Amazing: Local Psychic Accurately Predicted #1 The Moment She Heard #95
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
No longer taking place on a day celebrating white superiority, triple j’s Hottest 100 now only commemorates cultural superiority, with avid listeners around the country proving their intellect before their peers by accurately predicting song number #1 on the Hottest 100.
This year, it appears Betoota local Alice Waters (28) has done it again with her number 1 choice...
Pub Glassie Filled With National Pride While Cleaning Vomit Out Of Urinal At Midday
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
Young Ellie Wasson isnt having fun. .
“It’s not the working that has ruined it for me, it’s dealing with the large number of piss filled patrons that frequent the pub on January 26,” she told one of our reporters today.
As she attempted to smoosh schnitzel ridden vomit down the drain of the now clogged urinal, she told us...