Local News

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactAs Jules Southey   sips on her cup coffee at her friend Molly’s apartment, she quickly rediscovers why her visits are few and far between. The curse of the smug couple. You see, Molly and her partner Jason have been together since they were sixteen, falling instantly in love when they were placed in the same English class. Having only...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactWatching as one of her very sporty coworkers staggers in on a pair of crutches, local woman Vesper Tomlinson feels oddly vindicated. And yes, she knows that is an awful thing to say, but sporty people, especially early morning sporty people, have had too much power, for too long. As someone who was both athletically challenged and a lazy...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT A local boomer has done one for the culture today by ranting to airport staff about how long he has had to wait, all while quite the queue built up behind him. In case you do not have a disposable income, you should know that airports around the world have faced massive delays due to travel demands and airlines...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT As styles continue to grow and change, tattoos remain etched on human skin as if to say to would-be admirers ‘yes, I lived through this time, and yes, I was cool.’ Tattoo artistry is an ancient practice with roots in various cultures that continue to this day from the intricate lines of Māuri tā moko to the swirling colours...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT In great news to anyone who just wants to watch some sport, new legislature will require gambling ads to feature cautionary disclaimers other than ‘Gamble Responsibly’. With gambling apps now a big business, anyone with a rich dad and connections to a former American sports star can start such a business and advertise to you until they are the...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTIt has been confirmed that trying to cut through food or plastic packaging is an absolute fools game when armed with a motel knife.While on a channel country road trip, the Matherson family checked in to Betoota Shangri-La Springs Motel where mum Juilliane Matherson was keen to try some of the preserves and produce she purchased at the...

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTA local hens weekend has kicked off like Charlies Angels this morning, as a playlist of classic hits notches up to full throttle.Packing out a Toyota Rav4 on a road trip to Brisbane, The Advocate understands a carload of local ladies are gearing up for three days of rosé-induced carnage under the bright lights of Brisvegas.But...

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local bloke is questioning his own masculinity this morning, after being too scared to take a dump at a set of rest stop toilets. After a blissful early morning drive along the Pacific Highway, it’s believed local Chatswood man James Hustaway has been enjoying a truly euphoric road trip, as he kicks off a four day...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactAs she rifles through her top drawer, local woman Milly Whitehead yet again finds herself unfolding (okay, unscrunching) a top that has some kind of hole in it. This has so far included her favourite black turtleneck, a cute going out shirt, a jumper, tank top and a hoodie, which have all suspiciously gotten holes at roughly the same...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A project home in a quiet Betoota Heights cul-de-sac is currently the scene of a major investigation this week.  This comes after a local woman’s brand new tube of toothpaste mysteriously disappeared, just days after being purchased.  Breanna Blicavs (32) told The Advocate that the incident is an open investigation, with the major suspect still maintaining his innocence.  At the heart...