Local News

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactSharing a plate of nachos not only helps to take the edge off hunger but it also provides the perfect avenue to conduct a mild character assessment of your peers.  In fact, it’s arguably a fantastic meal for a first date, as it will tell you if your prospective beau is more likely to have admirable traits such as...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactIf Lindsay Tonkin has one thing going for her, it’s that she actually thinks she looks quite good crying. Which is a really good thing for her, seeing as she does it quite often.  Whether it’s a rough day at work, a problem with her dating life, the endless barrage of bills or the odd days of the month where...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local office worker has decided to take a leaf out of the weird period Tik Tok chick’s book, by trying to break down the stigma’s surrounding menstruation. Gwen Simpson is alleged to have done what many other female workers have done before her, and adhered to either stuffing a tampon into her pocket, opting for the claw...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactLocal woman Sera Schott has today reached boiling point, as her best mate has sent her yet another form of media she wants a response on. This usual daily routine can be anything from the ‘easy to respond to’ types of notifications, such as Facebook and Instagram tags, to the more time consuming - such as Tik Toks, Reels,...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local woman has today learned that being nice to a child means you’re definitely clucky, as everyone knows a childfree woman is a witch who snarls and hisses at the mere sight of a pint sized human. Despite having stated for a solid ten years that she had no desire to be a mum, Silvie Wenham has...

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTA boundary will remain uncrossed today as a Betootan therapist made it quite clear to one of her clients that she really doesn’t want to be in a BeReal post. BeReal is a newish social media app that gives out two randomly timed alerts during the day that require users to promptly upload a photo that shows...

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTOne of Betoota’s most vascular blokes is conducting some social media hygiene this evening, after a post-workout photoshoot went wrong. After a 90-minute session pumping iron at the Anytime Fitness in Betoota Ponds, local gym rat Jackson Martyn is believed to have taken a few thirsty snaps of his muscular frame, in an effort to acquire some...

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTA coastal Dad is winding back the clock this afternoon and introducing his 12-year-old son to the sounds of Australian metalcore. Growing up on the mid-north coast of NSW during the early 2000’s, local dad Brett Gordon is one of the lucky Australians to have lived and breathed the first big wave of coastal hardcore. Coming of age...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTLocal children have learnt skills for life today as the family matriarch gave them a lesson in conflict resolution. After cleaning the kitchen without help for the 3000th night in a row, mother Patricia Webb (48) finally expressed to her family that she was cross with them by ignoring them entirely. It is now three days into Webb’s cold war...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACTSeptember is an important time for the wedding and Australian football industry alike although the two are yet to share a common interest. Like all Millennials paying the wedding tax, Landon and Em had to reschedule their special day to spring 2022 after a registry office back-up plan was denied by the Bank of Mum & Dad. However, with their...