Sports

Victorian Friend Somehow Atop Of NRL Tipping Comp

TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact A group of local NRL enthusiasts have been left dumbfounded today after their mate from Melbourne fluked his way to the top of their NRL tipping competition ladder. William Ashby, an AFL supporter, only started is foray into rugby league at the beginning of the 2019 season, and much to the disappointment of his friends, he now sits with...

Choc’s Anti-Vax Comments Somehow Not The Most Worrying Opinion To Come Out Of An Ex-NRL Player This Week

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Former Brisbane Broncos and St George playmaker Anthony Mundine has somehow hid under the radar this week, despite his controversial comments urging people to question the merits of vaccinations. The outspoken boxer has since responded to backlash after his sensational social media outburst - claiming his controversial views were posted “probably too fired up” when he framed vaccinations programs...

Super Rugby Crowd Numbers Believed To Be At All Time Low Because All Their Fans Are In Hell

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A recent report by the AIS has found that the main reason that Super Rugby is struggling is not because of the fact that most of our talent is in Japan or France, but because all of their fans are trapped in hell. This comes as the dwindling Australian rugby fan base criticises one of our three good players,...

Izzy Very Lucky It’s A World Cup Year

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact It has been confirmed this morning that Rugby Union star Israel Folau is very lucky it's a World Cup year. This confirmation comes after the arguably most valuable player on the field for Australia took to Instagram last night to post an appalling meme about 'gay people going to hell.' With Rugby Australia officially 'investigating' the latest social...

Fox Sports Hire 1000 New Journos To Cover Every Single Detail Of Valentine Holmes’ NFL Journey

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact Online sports organisation Fox Sorts has today demonstrated how good they are at keeping a finger on the pulse. With news breaking this morning that former NRL player Valentine Holmes has signed with the New York Jets in the NFL, the sports organisation has urgently hired 1000 new reporters to cover the unfolding story. From the first time...

Nation Somehow Shocked By Campbelltown Boy With Neck Tattoos And Mohawk Using The Rude Finger

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Dusty Martin's top tier sledging of rival footballers has come under scrutiny this week, as fans and commentators say that they expected better for reason. Fresh reports have suggested that the AFL will investigate an alleged drugs-related sledge during Richmond’s loss to GWS in Sydney on Saturday - as if anyone really cares. After missing a kick at goal, Martin...

Vegan Protestor Immediately Joins The Katter Party After Seeing How Fucked Things Are Up North

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT One Melbourne-based animal rights advocate has today experienced a life-changing turn-around, after witnessing heartbreaking scenes on a cattle station he had trespassed onto in the Gulf Country. Guthrie Marley (35) says he's been forced to reconsider his extremely privileged position as a white inner-city hipster who has the luxury of being able to protest the fact that livestock who...

AFL Exists In Queensland Again

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact In a what comes as a shock to the people of Queensland this weekend, it has been confirmed today that Victorian Football exists in the state again. This confirmation comes after the Brisbane Lions managed to knock Port Adelaide over yesterday to go 3-0 to start the season. Starting the season 3-0 for the first time since 2010,...

NRL Confirm Broncos Will Feature In Thursday Or Friday Night Game Every Single Week In 2020

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact In some breaking news out of NRL HQ this morning, it has been confirmed that the Brisbane Broncos will feature in either Thursday or Friday Night Footy every single week in the 2020 season. Speaking to reporters today, in the first non-scandal related press conference since October last year, NRL CEO Todd Greenberg explained that next year they...

Frydenburg Gets Last-Minute Advice From Roosters Accountant To Get Budget Numbers In Order

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact Federal Treasurer and aspiring Coalition Prime Minister Josh Frydenberg has this afternoon gone the extra mile to get the nation's budget ship shape today. With an election looming, and the Nightwatchman's government in dire straits, Frydenberg exclusively told The Advocate this afternoon that he knew this year's budget had to be spot on. "The budget needs to return to...

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