The Nation

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact It's late November and Harry Tollman isn't as piss fit as he needs to be for this time of year - and a man of his experience in the advertising sales industry. Slumped at his desk like a frumpy old bean bag, Tollman says he doesn't know if he has it in him anymore. "I'm...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT "Guys, seriously" says Lillie (27), right on cue. "We should all move here haha" Lillie is currently going through the paces expected from someone on week-five of a brutal six month placement in Hobart. After wrapping up all of the fun tourist stuff like MOMA, and, umm, the ferry to and from MOMA, the dust has now settled and Lillie has...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The rage that washes over Roger Pevey's being whenever people bring up Australians celebrating Halloween has had his left ventricle blow out this afternoon when he discovered some people also choose to celebrate Thanksgiving, too. Around 3 pm this afternoon, the 67-year-old's family heard a soft pop come from the den where he enjoys watching...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some breaking news out of the harbour hell hole of Sydney, the music industry has just been informed that tonight's party is off! The annual industry awards held down at one of the only venues in the state where live music is still allowed, has officially been called off after NSW police spotted a man of Samoan...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Owners of the revoltingly impractical and expensive convertible Land Rover have been put on notice by UK Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn this morning, saying he will have them hanged immediately after an election win. The announcement is aimed at winning the radical-left vote - something expected to be key in this election. Mr Corbyn spoke to...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Betoota Grove man who converted his privileged private school background into a successful career is business has refused to host Christmas this year just because he can. The main reason why Mark Roland doesn't want to have Christmas at his place again is that his less successful relatives take the piss and stay there...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A Brisbane electrician has treated himself to a dip in the brown snake this afternoon. The 29-year-old decided to do so after failing to find a radio station not playing Dance Monkey despite trying for a significant period of time. "I don't know if the fucking thing is on repeat or what, but I couldn't land a frequency...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As Australians react to the shocking news that some the nation's favourite non-alcoholic beverages will now be Chinese-owned following $600 million takeover of one of Australia’s biggest dairy operations - there is even more confronting news on the horizon that will hit proper drinkers right in the liver. The Chinese dairy company Mengniu which earlier agreed to pay $1.5...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The underfire board members at Big 4 Bank Westpac have begun discreetly exploring other career opportunities it can be confirmed. This follows their CEO tragically and painfully being paid $2.7 million dollars to quit, and their Chairman stepping down after the bank they were in charge of was alleged to have facilitated serious money-laundering breaches. AUSTRAC is alleging...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In yet another inspiring example of the extra-lengths the New South Wales Police Force have taken to improve their reputation with the youth, the cops have today admitted to pressuring live music venues around the nation to cancel sold-out concerts for OneFour, the biggest musical act in the country. This comes after a long couple months for the NSW...