LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
A coming of age story well known around the nation has rung true this morning as local girl Matilda Hartman (15) began her transition into womanhood by switching from Impulse to Dove.
Hartman states she is like most girls her age, with an interest in music, sport and a strong desire to fit in socially.
It is for such reasons that she has begun transitioning out of wearing popular female body spray Impulse, a fragrant aerosol can with scents usually associated with feeling uncomfortable on public transport while a loud group of girls discuss their latest social civil wars.
Noticing that less of her friends were favouring the cherished body spray, Hartman asked her mum if she could instead purchase her a deodorant that actually does the job of a deodorant and not just make everything smell like a fairground floor after summer.
“It happens so soon,” stated Matilda’s teary-eyed mother Angie Hartman (44).
“I am not going to miss the smell of that shit but.”
This development is the latest in Hartman’s journey as a woman as told by deodorant.
The next stage involves purchasing the product for herself before moving into roll-on she purchases herself, then an expensive bespoke antiperspirant before reaching the final stage of industrial strength uni-sex deodorant from discount warehouses.