LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Many states and territories have allowed home visits of up to two individuals to ease the mental health impact incurred by two months of COVID-19 stress.
While the news has put a smile on the face of every overzealous wine-mum ahead of Mother’s Day, for a generation of MySpace users it has triggered PTSD style flashbacks of having to rank and be ranked.
Once the number one most used social media platform in the world, MySpace was started by a guy called Tom who later sold the company due to the guilt he felt for allowing Owl City to share their music with the world.
Unlike modern social media platforms focussed on peppering your day with multiple commodity logins, MySpace was a desktop medium where customising your profile was to a teenager what a well-groomed garden is to a boomer.
“I had a selfie dp of me, checkerboard background with some pics from Nightmare Before Christmas,” said every person who ever had an account on MySpace.
“Haha yeah, MKR started playing whenever you went on to my profile too.”
Memorably, the most controversial customisable feature of MySpace was the ability to curate your friend’s list in an order everyone correctly assumed was priority.
“I had a deal with my number 3, Edan Tampereli, that we would be each other’s number 3 no matter what. Anyway, one day, I go onto her profile to post ‘XD’ on her wall and I was down to number 6! Then I realised I wasn’t even in my number 1s top 8!?” stated former MySpace user Charlotte Bennett (28).
“I screamed so loud my mum thought I was being murdered and get this, she didn’t even understand how I felt.”
Now mostly a memory, Generation Y continues to heal from the scars of the MySpace top friends sections even if the two-person visitor limit has irritated those wounds like that annoying friend who used to post three to five bulletins a day.
“I am visiting mates tonight but we couldn’t invite everyone. I won’t be posting about it on social media, I wouldn’t want them to see. Whose number six now Edan?”