ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

ARMED WITH THE GUMMIEST SMILE in New Farm and an economics degree from a sandstone university, Gavin Coolidge has the rest of his life charted out with professional and society milestones clearly plotted out ahead of him.

Married prematurely last year at age 29, the credit solutions executive agrees that having a ring on the finger around the office shows bosses and headhunters alike that he’s not afraid of commitment and hard work – something Coolidge says sets him apart from the pack.

“By 35, I want to be head of my department. Either here or at a competitor, I have no loyalty to anything or anyone – other than my wife, that is,” he said. “By then, I should be in a position to have a child or two. If the first one doesn’t have any disabilities or autism, we could possibly stretch to three.”

However, despite being financially and emotionally secure, Gavin says he doesn’t mind being the ‘boring’ one in his diverse group of friends.

“My mates always rouse on me because I only have two or three ciders with the lads before Catherine calls me home [laughs]. Just shoot me! They’ll come round when they find the right person. But they won’t meet that person dry-humping strangers in the bushes in Centenary Square that’s for sure.”

Friend Michael is a lifelong hospitality professional and says he’d never trade his weekly cycle of doing ecstasy, working 12-hour days and sleeping with strangers for Gavin’s life.

Another close pal, Rick, is a private wealth manager, a job not dissimilar to Mr Coolidge’s role – but it’s much more social.

“Look, Gav is a good bloke, but he’s not the type of mate you’d tap on the shoulder on the way to the disabled toilet, you know?” he said.

“The boss and I piss it up on Thursday and Fridays, from lunch most weeks, and by midnight, we’ve got our ties around our heads in some club down the Valley,”

“Or if they’re having a vaporwave night at Lefty’s, we’d go there and ask every bloke in baggy pants if they’re selling ketamine,”

“Gav isn’t about that life, he’d rather be at home with his wonderful wife eating cheese or bagels or whatever those perverts eat, I don’t really care.”

 

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