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As of five days ago, The World Health Organisation has announced that COVID-19 is a pandemic.

The situation is changing rapidly over the world, with more than 226,800 confirmed cases of COVID-19 around the world and more than 9,500 deaths.

In Australia, there have been 709 confirmed cases of COVID-19 as of 6.30am this morning. That’s up from 144 new cases since 6.30am yesterday. But that could have gone up a fuckload after we let that stupid cruise ship into port without any tests.

LISTEN TO OUR INTERVIEW WITH DR NORMAN SWAN ABOUT THE DANGERS OF COVID-19 AND WHAT WE NEED TO BE DOING!

However, despite the rapid escalation of this national health crisis, the Australian media are doing their very best to cause as much shit as possible.

Supermarket punch ons over toilet paper continue across Australia due to A Current Affair sensationalism, while conservative commentators like Alan Jones continue to tell his vulnerable elderly listeners that this pandemic is a hoax.

In response to this, the Australian people are now pleading with the Australian media to please stop referring to this troubling chapter in modern history as “2019/20202 Coronavirus Pandemic” – but instead as simply “these uncertain times”

Thousands of online petitions and radio callers have made noise across social and traditional media channels this week, calling for a transition to “These Uncertain Times” – to help manage the public response.

Historians are also being urged to use ‘these uncertain times’ as a working title, for when planet earth begins looking for their own ‘black death’ type name for this specific pandemic.

It is unknown at this point where the weirdly poetic expression ‘these uncertain times’ came from, but many would assume the Irish are behind it.

Prime Minister Morrison has told reporter that his government has entertained only referring to this global health emergency as ‘these uncertain times’ – however, the coalition faces strong opposition from Bob Katter MP who demands it only be referred to as ‘that dastard bat flue’.

You can find out how the government are monitoring and responding to the outbreak, how you can help slow the spread of COVID-19 in Australia, and what to do if you have symptoms by visiting www.health.gov.au/news/health-alerts/novel-coronavirus-2019-ncov-health-alert

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