ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The Opposition Leader had three goes at getting a zinger soundbite sounding right this morning before asking the journalists there if he could pretty please have one more go at it.

Speaking today at the retirement party of Labor Member Chris Hayes, who’s leaving behind a safe seat in south-west Sydney, Anthony Albanese took the opportunity to throw a barb into the Government’s rump on the way out of the party.

“This, ah, this ScoMo, as he’s a, fuck,” started Albo.

“Scott Morrison is much like his Orangeman prod bastard cousin in Belfast, Van Morrison, in that he never likes to play his hit tracks because he thinks ah, hold on, that’s not a good analogy. I have lots of prod friends.”

The two ABC journalists laughed and deleted the last two sound files from their recorders. They smiled as Albo composed himself for take three.

“This Prime Minister steals from the rich and, ah for Frug’s sake, hold on, I’ll get it now. Just let me have one more go,” sighed Albo.

“This fake bogan Scott Morrison steals from the weak and gives it to the strong. He’d lock people up for getting paid too much from Centrelink but gives his mash-potato-brain mates like Gerry Harvey another blank cheque for millions of taxpayer, uh, dollars. He’s a fake, he’s a phoney. He doesn’t even know the rules to God’s winter game, which is rugby fucking league,”

“There, how was that one?”

The journalists nodded and he even got a smile from David Speers.

“All right, time to get back to it.”

More to come.


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